YUGYAG

ok..

I know, this is a gay blog, but then this blog is all about me, what i think, what i feel. And hence i have all right to write anything in it. So let me write something, which is serious. Which affects my life. I don't know, if same problem affects anybody else too.

But, I am not going through a great phase. Actually, this is cyclical. It happens all the time. I don't know if this is something to do my sexuality or this is just a psychological problem.

I am depressed, not exactly depressed too. But i need some exciting work to work on. I need a great stimulant. I feel as if all the world is making fun of me, and that makes me sad.

I am too ambitious. I make so many plans, but then somewhere down the line, the plans do not work, as per my expectations. The problem is in plan, or in the execution or just in me. I am not able to resolve this.

I know my weaknesses.

I need lots and lots of unconditional love. This problem is affecting my professional life too. Cause i need this from my professional environment, which is not possible in today's times. It is the most ideal situation, which anybody would love to work in. But my problem is, I just can not .. just can not take any pressure, if i know that my boss or my colleagues do not like me. I need to be part of the group. My association need is too high. And i don't know how to take care of it.

As of now, i have left my job.. or whatever freelancing work i was doing. I am not feeling happy. I know i have lots and lots of potential But then everything wasted because of my emotional status.This problem is affecting my career, my future.. and unfortunately, i am not able to do anything about it.

I dont know if any of my reader has solution to this problem.